Full Moon in Scorpio
26.04.2021
First some relatable analogies and themes of Scorpio for context
Scorpio is the most intense and primal sign of the zodiac. Scorpio is the rite of passage between life and death which is why it is the season that hosts Samhain/Halloween honouring the souls who have passed on. Scorpio is that really visceral chill you feel in your bones between seasons when there is no separation between the old and the new which is why the scorpio moons fall in transitions between autumn to winter and winter to spring. Scorpio is the descent into the dark seemingly endless void of winter. Scorpio is the return of the light and welcome relief of coming up for air in spring. Scorpio is the sacred pause of nothingness; that little rest between breaths. Scorpio is the blurred line between breakdown and breakthrough like when you finally leave the job or relationship that was eating you alive and the surges of relief and grief you feel when you leave something behind. Scorpio is the messy space between who you once were and who you are yet or about to become. Scorpio is intense feelings that bring immense healing. The pandemic is very scorpionic- 2021 is the beginning of the rebirth which is always symbolised by signs of hope and transformational change alongside the death and decay. Scorpio’s deep power lies in making friends with surrender, of letting go of the old, like the beauty of leaves rotting into the earth providing precious nutrients for new life to grow.
In terms of my own birth chart the archetype that has taught me the most in my life about my self worth and creative purpose is Scorpio. Scorpio is the most misunderstood healing sign of the zodiac because of its intensity, depth and darkness, but if you can come out the other side brings immense transformation of shite into light. Look at the words death and depth, the only difference is the letter ‘A’. A stands Art- dying/letting go is an art, to go deep with yourself is an art. I’m not gonna lie scorpio doesn’t fuck about. Scorpio is the sign that has brought me to my knees in fight, flight, fuck and freeze eventually calling me to surrender, shake, primal dance and scream in the most animal-like emotional release. This literally happened on the scorpio new moon last year just before I re-birthed Hunter And Her and released my comeback single The Cocoon. Rebirthing my art brought up all of my light and my shite at the same time as is the nature of self actualisation. This is a reason why I gave up music for so long. Because I wasn’t emotionally or mentally strong enough to hold myself through my core wound of sometimes crippling self doubt.
Scorpio and Mental Health
Scorpio in my experience is about mental health more than anything else. Scorpio is known as the psychotherapist of the zodiac because of its propensity to investigate the psyche. Scorpio is very much related to psychiatrist Carl Jung, depth psychology and shadow work. Scorpio is associated with the shadow parts of the human psyche like anger, fear, grief, shame, jealousy and despair. These emotions have been deemed inappropriate by our culture so they got stuffed down into the collective unconscious hence the term shadow “hidden from sight”. The thing is shadow emotions are not bad, they are part of a rich range of feelings and expressions that make us human. What causes discomfort is our thought/belief about these emotions that causes a judgement of good or bad so the mind/ego shuts the feeling down to keep us safe from judgment. Then the emotion gets stuck and lives in our bodies.
Much research has shown that unprocessed emotions cause depression and dis-ease in the body. Gabor Matè's 'When The Body Says No' is a really insightful book to read on this. Shadows are usually really tender vulnerabilities we are scared to admit so we hide them underneath embarrassment/shame and shove those precious parts of ourselves down underground. In my own lived experience I do not see any separation between my mental health and healing my creative expression. My experience of anxiety and depression I now see were arrows pointing me in one direction. They were asking me to feel.
Scorpio and Emotional and Creative Healing
I am proof that emotional and creative healing can happen in tandem and yet some really dark periods of my life were very much just about my mental health and survival. And that is ok. Feeling everything at once put me into overwhelm and my system had to shut down to help me rest and process.
Scorpio is life and death remember. Scorpio is mostly related to the ego and metaphorical psychological death or death to the ego. Scorpio is associated with a snake shedding its skin. Imagine your beliefs had skin. Scorpio wants us get curious about the skin we are living in, our thought processes around our feelings so we no longer fuse the thought and the feeling which becomes a belief which becomes our identity and therefore skin we habitually live in. The more I would try to shut self doubt out, the louder it became until I could no longer ignore the mental, emotional, physical and spiritual pain I was in. I had to dig deeper. I had to begin to peel away at those layers. My self doubt was rooted in feelings of low self worth, I had to work slowly to build up my self esteem which brought me back to my gifts hiding under all this other shit like toxic cultural conditioning and childhood trauma.
That’s why I made the acronym for A.R.T. A-ching R-aw T-ruth as there is always so much I’ve had to continually overcome to put myself and work out there.
Because underneath your shit are your creative gifts.
If you don’t think you are creative you are believing the greatest myth.
Scorpio wants you to sit with this, if a Scorpio was a person they would tell you the hard loving truth that you not believing you are creative is bullshit.
Scorpio And The Heart
Scorpio wants you to get intimate with your heart as the place to start. The heart rules our emotional bodies and feelings. Scorpio wants you to face your fears and accept and try to love them so completely that you weep and cry yourself to sleep with healing tears. Scorpio wants you to face the wounds of old so you learn to self hold and reclaim your gold.
Scorpio is a water sign, water is associated with emotion. Scorpio doesn’t do shallow waters, scorpio wants you to go straight into your unfelt feelings, rawest vulnerabilities and deepest sensitivities.
Why? Because to me this is the place you will find your most honest creativity.
Scorpio wants to take you into the shadow watery places of your soul to dig for your own gold. Scorpio is the ultimate gold digger. By gold I mean truth. I mean your A.R.T. Scorpio wants your whole A-ching R-aw T-ruth. Scorpio is also associated with the element of fire and wants to give you a torch to help you see in the dark. Scorpio wants to help you speak the stories you are ashamed to tell and the places you are scared to reveal but ultimately this is what will help you heal. Scorpio is hidden power calling you to unearth your deepest place of self worth in order to prepare you for a major creative rebirth. Scorpio wants you to go underneath the surface to reveal your creative purpose. Scorpio wants you to embrace your soul scars with reverence and love, for they mark every battle you fought and won rough. Scorpio wants you to reclaim the power you have been self denying so you can rise from the ashes like the Phoenix rising.
Scorpio and Remembering My Power
POWER IS NEVER LOST, ONLY TRANSFORMED. ART IS ALCHEMY WHEN WE TURN OUR SHITE INTO LIGHT.
Scorpio is about finding deep inner power and freedom from dismantling external structures that have caused inner ruptures of our self perception.
Scorpio is about curiosity and questioning how and why we relate to ourselves in certain ways
I had to find a new way of creating a relationship to how I saw and treated myself.
Nearly 2 years ago I came up with a poetic teaching concept called SHIFT TO YOUR GIFT I have kept secret until now. Being completely transparent I wasn’t fully in my power to be able to share it yet. The older and greyer I become, I truly believe like a seed we have to grow into our visions and I had some more self acceptance and self actualisation work to do on myself first before I could share this to help others. Here is the fiercely loving intention behind my now not so secret SHIFT TO YOUR GIFT© teaching.
Remember, I’m Glaswegian so I like to swear which shows I care.
WHEN YOU COMMIT TO REALLY SEEING AND ACCEPTING YOUR SHIT, THAT’S WHEN YOU SHIFT TO YOUR GIFT.
I’ve got to a point in my life where I can admit these 3 things and and actually be more than alright with them. If I’m honest it is has come as a real lived experience since I took the leap of faith and released Hunter And Her last year that:
1. My greatest gift is also my deepest shit.
2. My greatest gift can co-exist alongside my shit.
3. There is no separation between my core wound of self doubt and living my biggest dreams out.
There is only one difference between the words shit and shift and that is the letter ‘F’
F is for “feeling”
I now fully know in my bones there is nothing about myself I have to fix and everything to feel
The difference is how I’ve learned to deal.
Scorpio doesn’t not allow me to let self doubt run my life anymore. For a long time it did. I couldn’t think my way back to my creativity I had to feel. After many years of therapy for emotional healing and mentorship for creative recovery I see my shadows were not my natural state but it was the way I had learned to self RELATE.
I had to begin to un-fog the my inner mirror so I could see myself clearer.
This has taken a huge amount of practice to expand my nervous system to be able to be fully seen. This is ongoing work and takes patience, perseverance and support. Don’t be fooled, every teacher and mentor has their own teacher and mentor. Which brings me to the golden glue that holds the community and The Cocoon together.
MIRROR MEDICINE©
We are relational beings hardwired to connect.
We have been sold the shit show that perfection will bring us more connection.
Perfection is the biggest myth, it doesn’t exist.
When you try to be perfect before you are seen, there is a vulnerable part of yourself you have to judge or reject which causes an internal disconnect.
Self perfection and deep human connection cannot coexist.
Perfection chokes connection.
This is where my group teaching method Mirror Medicine© comes in
When you use your inner mirror to self reflect and look inside, then share your innermost feelings and findings with another, your story can become a form of healing for yourself and the other.
When you see and hear the lost parts, the aching places and the golden gifts of yourself in others’ stories, this creates transformational shifts as the places where we usually want to hide find acceptance and belonging. Relational healing expands our bodies nervous system to hold more of our vulnerability and power. We are all reflections of each other, we all have shite and when we bring the shite to the light in conscious ways it can bring so much healing, freedom and power.
I can see myself in the wounds and wonders in you, and you can see yourself in the wounds and wonders in me.
I truly believe sharing our hearts is a form of art. It is a practice of being able to slowly expand our capacity to be more of who we truly are. It takes time to build trust in ourselves and others and the only way to do it is to practise little by little over time. Scorpio is all about deep relating and intimacy built on a foundation of loving boundaries, honesty, bravery, accountability and conscious vulnerability. This is why I created a private social network as this kind of connection needs a very sealed container for this delicate work to unfold.
When we gift our vulnerability in non-judgmental spaces we can help each other rewrite the places we tend to habitually hide and dim our light.
SHARING STORIES IS THE MOST UNDERRATED QUALITY RESOURCE WORTH ITS WEIGHT IN GOLD.
We are all artists.
An A.R.T.I.S.T. shares the A-ching R-aw T-ruth I-n S-tories T-old Stories help us to process, transform and renew.
Hence why it’s called The Cocoon.
The Cocoon is the most empowering support bubble as we navigate the messiness of our human struggle
CLOSING THOUGHTS
My shit was the story I was telling myself about my gifts, that they were not good enough, and even when I found a more stable sense of self worth, I had to contend with really low self belief and lack of self confidence. I now know when and how to call self doubt out. And when I don’t, I seek out Mirror Medicine for support.
I leave you with this creative prompt and hope you join us on Monday 26th April for the full moon gathering for an empowering meditation, transformation ritual, primal dance, and mirror medicine. It is potent to to do transformational work around the moons because the Moon is the biggest mirror we have. The moon moves the tidal patterns and as our bodies are mostly made up of water it moves our emotions. The Moon is a luminary that illuminates our shite and brings it up to the light to be transformed into more light.
Everybody has a story
What is your A.R.T.?
Your A-ching R-aw T-ruth that longs to be told?
What shit are you shovelling trying to turn to gold?
May you know are the greatest alchemist of your shit.
Come into The Cocoon and be truly seen heard, held and empowered as you shift to your gift.