WHY WE ALL NEED A MENTOR
by Francesca Filippa founder of Hunter And Her
WHY WE ALL NEED A MENTOR
This is a vast topic and if you are like me and can get super inspired/totally overwhelmed/ go off on tangents and down rabbit holes when writing about something that deeply means something to you write a list!
Here is acronymic list of the immeasurable need and value of having a mentor. I live for creating acronyms and finding hidden meanings in words so here we go.
Let’s dive into the word M.E.N.T.O.R and what I believe it stands for as someone who swears by having mentors for all of my adult life and and who has been a mentor myself since 2018. This piece is dedicated to all my mentors and teachers, past, present and future. You have helped me stand in my light and own my power and I honour you eternally through this life and beyond.
M. A mentor is a Mirror for the places you may not be able to see clearly in yourself. The parts of yourself you habitually squash or hide, the parts of yourself you have forgotten, the parts of yourself you struggle to accept or long to reconnect with. A mentor helps you consciously reflect and connect to all parts of you. A mentor allows you to integrate your insecurities and illuminate your strengths so you can become more of who you are. A mentor helps you clear the lens you see yourself through again and again and again. If your mentor inspires you it’s because you are seeing something in them that is reflecting that very thing in you. A mentor is a mirror you can take your mask off with and be seen in all your shite and your light as I like to playfully call it.
E. A mentor is an all Embracing Encourager and Empowerer. A mentor is someone who offers warm empathy, holds your heart safe and celebrates you through all of your perceived failures and successes. A mentor is someone who pulls out your hidden potential and is in your corner as a support system as you go through the messy spiralling process of healing and self actualisation. A mentor is a guide and second spine that leads you back to your own sense of personal power whilst backing you when you are struggling to back yourself. A mentor believes in you no matter what.
N. A mentor is a Nurturer of your personal power and potential who accepts and praises you for who you are now and who you can be. Our self expression is our inner child, if our younger self’s voice, passions and gifts were not celebrated or encouraged it takes tender loving care to recover expression and rewire our neural pathways to know that it is safe and welcome to share our whole truth with someone who truly sees and hears us. A mentor provides a nurturing nervous system to co-regulate with to cultivate healthy relational connection and self expression.
T. A mentor is a Trusted Truth Teller and Tracker We all need a confidante who we can reveal our truths to in a boundaried container that we feel seen held and heard in with no judgment. I know many people who call their container with their mentor ‘The Vault’ I like to say “keep this in the cauldron”. A mentor also helps us stay accountable to our own truth so that any time we may fall out of alignment, a mentor is someone that will curiously ask questions to lead us back to our innate knowing and sometimes lovingly and directly call us out to get back on track.
O. A mentor is an Open-minded Objective Outsider that is not your friend, partner or family. It’s so important to have a relationship like this in our life so our other connections have breathing room to be what they are. Our partner can be a partner, a friend a friend. Our other relationships can have emotional enmeshments where people tell us what they think we want to hear instead of what we need to hear. A mentor is emotionally detached enough to see things from a neutral space. A mentor is a supportive and practical soundboard to bounce ideas off and get constructive feedback on projects or for things going on in your life. A mentor is also a way-shower that Opens you up to what is possible.
R. A mentor is a Re-memberer and Reminder that helps you Remember your worth, Reclaim your power and Reveal all parts of yourself so that you may fully express your truth and become all of who you are in this lifetime. This is healing on all levels for you and everyone around you.
The Most Important Disclaimers between Mentor and Mentee:
A mentor is not a one size fits all, a mentor is part of a village of your support network.
Mentors are human and fallible and doing the best they can, don’t project a sense of superiority on them by putting them on pedestals as this perpetuates unhealthy hierarchical capitalist structures that see people as perfect products to consume, judge and take from instead of living, breathing organisms to relate and co-create with. The more inner work you do to see yourself, the more a mentor can help you stand in your own truth.
First and foremost, you are your own best mentor and your mentor is not a guru, your mentor is also a human with their own projections and perceptions of life. Every mentor has had and should continually have mentors to help keep their channel clear for others. Ultimately our greatest mentor is our own truth. As humans we are relationally wired and need another to get to know ourselves. We are human and need validated, affirmed and guided as this cultivates safety, security, connection and belonging. This is what makes us interdependent and fosters community and collaboration over competition and hyper-individualism.
We are all mirrors meandering together illuminating the nebulous path of the unknown.
I am a self belief, self expression and creative purpose mentor.
If you feel the call that is your soul speaking.
Reach out at the contact page or the email address in the last slide so we can have a chat and it would be an honour to tell you more about the containers I offer.
In deep respect to you on your soul’s path wherever you are at,
Francesca Filippa x